Ahoy! It’s Ye Olde Tacky Theme Wedding!

Hola Readers! I hope everybody is doing well as we roll into Halloween Week. You know, that’s one thing I’ve never been asked to do — plan a Halloween destination wedding. That doesn’t mean it will never happen — ANYTHING can happen — but it hasn’t happened yet. Makes me shiver just to think about it. But it gave me the idea for today’s blog: wedding themes.

What exactly is a wedding theme? Well, different people define it different ways. To some, it simply means what kind of flowers and décor they’re using, and carrying those colors through the entire wedding. To some brides, it means choosing a cool seashell or graphic of the island where you’re getting married and printing it on anything that will hold ink, from cocktail napkins to matchbooks to tote bags to invitations. In my opinion, these are “acceptable” interpretations of a wedding theme.

Unfortunately, it’s diversity that makes the world go ’round. And there are brides who define a wedding theme the way they might define any party “theme.” Come on, you’ve seen the same doozies I’ve seen on those wedding TV shows — pirate weddings, Broadway weddings, Renaissance Fest weddings, Goth weddings, and yes, Halloween weddings.

Now I have some wacky brides (and I mean that in a good way), but I don’t have anybody who wants to make her guests walk the plank or talk in Olde English throughout the reception. I don’t know if I could plan one of those — I wouldn’t be able to keep a straight face. Neither would my husband.

The point of my rant is this: if you are having a destination wedding, the destination is your theme. Think local crafts for reception favors and local bands for music. Think tiki torches and steel drums and Coqui frogs and geckos and tropical flowers. Think sand and palm trees and aqua waters.

It’s perfectly okay to find a cool graphic to print on everything, and it’s perfectly okay to choose a few specific colors and carry them through with your dresses, flowers, napkins and other such things. But fight the urge to do something weird. Suppress your desire to shock your guests. For once in your life, don’t throw out everything that is traditional when you plan your wedding. Find a tactful way to incorporate the colors, music and style that represents you and your groom. But do it in good taste.

I can’t decide which frightens me more — attending a theme wedding or planning a theme wedding. If I plan it, I can blame it on the bride and groom’s taste. If I attend it, I have to keep a straight face during the ceremony and accept the fact that the people who did it are actually friends of mine. In either case, I hope they choose a theme that lets me wear a mask so nobody knows I’m there.

Now don’t misinterpret what I’ve said — it’s totally okay to do fun, wacky and creative things for your wedding. You can float rubber duckies in the pool at your reception site. You can serve Yodels or HoHos (along with something real to eat) as dessert at your reception. And you can let your brother’s barbershop quartet perform at your ceremony. Just don’t get carried away. Remember, the pictures will last forever. The memories will be burned in your guests’ minds. And you have to live with it “til death do you part.”

Until next time, Happy Wedding Planning!

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